Tuesday, June 5, 2012

The worst thing about mammos

Don't get me wrong, there are PLENTY of things I dislike about mammograms. 

I mean, they're extremely awkward, (Hi total stranger. Sure you can touch 'em. I mean, we've been together in the same room for like 2 minutes now, right?) 

And just when you don't think you can be squeezed any flatter, the tech literally tightens the screws to flatten your pancake down to a crepe. Nice.

So yeah, while I dislike this procedure for the aforementioned reasons, the WORST thing about them, in my opinion, is this:

Why, oh WHY must there be pictures on the referral form from my doctor?! She handed it to me in February, and it's been laying on my desk at home ever since. Sometimes it peeks out from under another paper and just stares at me, and I think, "I know, I KNOW!! I've gotta' make an appointment to get those things smashed. Stop yelling at me!"  And then when I actually go in for the appointment, I have to pull the paper out again, and hand it over to the receptionist. And there they are, staring at us both. Again I say, AWKWARD.

If a picture on the referral form is necessary, I'm thinkin' we can do better. This, for instance, would be much less embarrassing and much more accurate:

Who's with me?


  1. precisely why I haven't had one yet.... I KNOW!!!
    My beef with the photo is that mine certainly do not look that perky and perfect!

    1. I finally did the deed last week, but had this in "draft" mode before that. The only reason I finally made the appointment, is because AFLAC pays me to get them smashed, which really sounds bad, doesn't it? Oh well, at least it's legal. (And yes, whose boobs are those on that paper anyway?! So wrong. )